Um..Hey there?:)

It's one of those days where I suddenly get sick of everything and everyone . It's like I don't even know what I want and who are my friends . So tired of people looking for me when they have nobody else. I constantly tell myself. Since they treat u like a trash , when they turn to you , just say say "No" to any request. But like a dumbo , when they turn to me , all the anger inside will suddenly disappear , and I will just agree. The truth is , I prioritise some of my friends over others for various reasons . Some I just felt that I really needed them in my life and some I just felt like our friendship was so long and I had some kind of commitment to it .  I hate it when I drift away from friends because it is a really sad thing when u have to walk past them being strangers with memories . Happy times together you know that you will never get back because no matter how hard you try , it's something you will never be able to get back to its original st...

Haven't updated this space for quite a while because nobody reads it anyway😂 but because nobody is reading it, that's why I am updating it now:-) maybe a memory for myself ? Honestly I really hate myself sometimes for prioritising friendships too much. I guess at different phase of my life I was really attached to different friends( but obviously they will never know because I can hide my feelings really well in this aspect la) . But every time , the feeling seems to be the same . It is a feeling I hate a lot. Ok take for example friend A. When I see friend A hanging out with someone else, and prioritising that person over me , I will get really really mad and upset and hurt and idek . I will feel a rush of anger because I feel like I am not as important . Call me selfish , but I like to be prioritised. It feels good to be prioritised isn't it ? I remember in year 1 I was so mad at this friend that I really really liked a lot hahahahaha . I was so damn angry that she...

Too many things that I just have to let out.  It's really sad when I say I don't care, but deep down inside I really really care. About many things . Looking fine doesn't mean I am feeling fine . It is sad how you walk past people you used to know, wanting to say hi but you know you can't . After all we are just strangers with memories. Things doesn't happen. People just drift apart/ people just started to not give a shit. If I am the only one trying , seriously what is the point ?? You want to give up on  it but also 不捨得放手. Then there are those who can't stop Bitching about you although your are supposedly friends? so ridiculous omg. It takes $0 to be decent so stop being so ..... Look at me angstying. People say that one shouldn't brood over losing friends because you can make new ones. But some times New friends can just never replace the old ones?? Yup friendship is not about time..but for me old is srsly gold. I think I trust those that I know long...

Happy christmas !! what i am gonna type is really random haha just reflectingmy primary school life i guess :-) sharing my boring but precious childhood. Basically i am only typing down things i can rmb So when i was 7, i remembered i was eggcited lil kid who looked forward so much to get into primary school haha because i felt that i grew up :')?? I wanted to be a model student and everything and be a really good kid. That lasted for erm half a year only?i started crying and dreading to go school idk y :( Nevertheless i was still a really good kid in my teacher's eyes i guess and i became a prefect in primary 2.( couldn't really rmb what happen in that year). Oh except that i quit Chinese dance to join skipping. But it was horrible haha :( i was scolded like some poop so i just threw the skipping rope on the floor and left lol haha. That was the only skipping session i attended. YUP I QUIT IN ONE SESSION . In P 3, i rmbered my math got 88/100 and i got scolded by t...

Disappointments over disappointments idek what to expect anymore. am i not trying hard enuff so tiring to act like everything is oright when it is not lehhhhh better days please i. am.so.tired.what.even. Do anyone ever get that moment of impulse to do something??? I GET THAT alot these days like i suddenly feel like deactivating all my SNS accounts or suddenly feel like texting someone haha ( like doing stuffs that i will know i will regret..?) Asdfghjkl

So this year had been an eventful year :)? ok at least for me. First time in my life facing so many failures in a year so it is something worth remembering haha but below are some goals in my life ▻ get straight teeth ▻lose weight( i said this for the past few years:( but cant help:( i love food) ▻get good results ( i honestly damn 烦恼over this kayz i am super desperate to do well:( honestly i do study i swear) ▻go to japan ( i want to go to a legit onsen and look at sakura tree and see the high school uniforms there :)) ▻stop shopping so much ▻be a better person (like idk being nice to everyone?? is that even possible hahA) ▻i am GONNA make a time capsule ( inspired by korean dramas:) and this book i read) i swear i had alot to say at first but i cant remember anything anymore T^Tbye

Seniors' graduation+submitting WR + Tsecheng's birthday  ♥ So many things happening in a day !! My pw group had been working on our report since forever. So the day before submission,we read through our report about 5 times, Our report was about 70+ pages( not including annex etc).. i almost puked reading it over and over again . super troublesome, but we cant be lazy ifwe want good grades hahahaha. By the time we finished, it is about 11pm. So someone had to pon s chool the next day to print out the wr. And + the next day was the senior's graduation day, so i wanted to prepare study packs for my seniors haha ♥. So in the end i reached school at about 12! just in time to see my seniors :)) Super thankful to this three seniors ↓   yingxuan trying to act tall hahaa ^ yep still my fav^^^^ ALL MY FAVS^ Seriously will miss all of you:( Ur are the closest batch to us and stayed the longest with us too:( cant believe that your are graduating...